Diligent

Daily I decide to deal

with the degradation of

my dignity with

dalliances into day

dreaming and doting

on the don’ts, the

doubtful and the

didn’t happens.

I squander the sensitivities

I so sincerely wish to spend

on the special, softer sex with

spoliations of my stuttering

speech and slurred intention.

This thumping in my

throat, from a thudding

heart, threatens the temerity

of my intentions and the

tone of my thinking.

How hard I hope for a

half-moment to hold her

hand in a heated moment

and hear her whispered

heart humming a harmonious

hymn of happiness.

For as far as I can feel

with every fiber in my

flesh, I can’t forget the

fantasy her female form

found worthy in this

foolishness.

All around my adoration

is an abyss of the actual and

the armored anti-bodies of

the real anatomy of amorous

attention.

I am diligent in my delusion

but deftly aware of it’s seriousness.

No drifting into damaging day-dreamings,

deny the depth of the desire

and do the can do’s, the doable,

and the definite.