Friday, February 14, 2014
A Clarification on St. Valentine's Day
Be it a recovered Pagan Holiday from
Roman times under the guise of Christianity or a Hallmark holiday left out in
the rain, St. Valentine’s Day is an important holiday. While most people say
that every regular day is an opportunity to love, I say that this day in
particular is really a great reminder of what love really means.
Love is certainly different for all
of us. I know that I have loved many people in many different ways. Yet I still
appreciate love in a very profound way. Love is important to me. It stands for
trust, acceptance, honesty, compassion, empathy and warmth. I say warmth at the
end there because when I think of love I think of a warm and cozy environment.
A roaring fire in a fireplace and a special person to snuggle with on a cold winter’s
eve is an ideal picture of that warmth. I’ve of course, never had a fireplace
or dated a woman that had one either, I can only speculate on what my
imagination considers warming love.
I do not think of St. Valentine’s
Day as a Hallmark Holiday though. I am not that cynical and I do still believe
very much in the power of love. (Cue Huey Lewis) I think that love between two
people is a real and amazing event that transcends time and space. I believe in
it wholly and think it is marvelous. When I see two people in genuine love I
get a little misty. I think there is no more beautiful thing between humans
than love. It is an abstract concept however. Love.
We really don’t know what it is. Is
it a biochemical reaction to the release of certain pheromones? Is it a bonding
instinct left over from our days as pre-evolutionary homo sapiens? Is it alien
control? Is it just a fiction created by a religion to encourage people to stay
with their tribe? I don’t really know, but what I do know is that it exists and
I see examples of it every day. It is our capacity for love that makes humans
so very unique. We want it and we want to give it. We want it in our lives. We
are aware of the consequences of a loveless life and do all that we can to
avoid it.
I like love. I miss love. I miss the
love of a woman, present in my life, in the very here and now hoping the very
best for me and I miss doing the same for her. I like to give love. It’s a
shame that we all have to hide our love for each other due to societal
protocol. Although I will admit my guilt in this matter as well since I tend to
treat love with an almost Edwardian/Victorian air. A sort of cloistered and
reserved feeling I hide beneath my lapel. Yet, it’s still there, beating and
humming, under my ribs. I feel it quite often actually. I probably fall in love
at least three times a day; with bartenders, waitresses, women walking their dogs.
I fall in love with ideas, I fall in
love with the imagined life I would have with a woman, I fall in love with the
sparkle and smile on a woman’s face even when I know I shouldn’t. I’m fiercely
jealous for my loves and feel deeply the wounds of un-reflected adoration. I just know that it’s important. Somewhere
deep in my soul I just know that it counts for something and I want it ever the
more.
Love, especially on this St.
Valentine’s Day is a real thing and should not be chalked up as some corporate
greeting card holiday, but a real and true celebration of the greatest achievement
of humankind. Our capacity for true and real love, real or imagined, exists.
And it deserves a day of recognition. It is our greatest strength and at times
our greatest weakness, but it is truly ours and we should own it as best we
can.
Love,
Michael
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