I sweat the small
stuff and almost never worry about the big stuff. It’s just who I am or at
least it’s the person I’ve become. I get a little upset when there’s no sugar
left at the coffee station at work. All that’s there is the god damn Equal
which tastes like powdered asshole. It
is nearly enough to drive me over the edge of sanity and reason and start
taking stuffed animals as “hostages” and demand more sugar through a megaphone.
I get very annoyed
at the little things. A woman riding the train sat next to me wearing a back pack.
She didn’t take the back-pack off but sat down facing the aisle so the back
pack took up most of the seat, and mashed up against me. She never looked back.
Not even once. Never apologized or had any thought that her large back-pack
might be shoved up against a stranger.
Watch your feet
when you walk downtown, I take that back, watch other people’s feet when you
walk downtown. I can’t tell you how often I get kicked in the bottom of the
foot by people not paying attention to the speed or movement of the people in
front of them. I just want to turn around and morph into some kind of giant
head chomping monster, tear their fool head off their body and spray the remaining
crowd with their entrails.
One little thing I
think we can all agree on are liars. I can’t stand being lied to. Especially
when I know you’re lying. There’s nothing wrong with telling the truth. I hate
myself for it too. I’m no angel and I have told my share of white lies but I’m
trying very hard to be as truthful as humanly possible. I usually lie to spare
someone’s feelings, which I suppose may seem noble but probably isn’t.
Modern technology
has given us a lot of amazing gifts, especially in the realm of portable music.
However this doesn’t mean I want to hear how much you enjoy rap. That
repetitive, constant droning beat over a mumbling speed talker is not how I
want to start my morning so let’s turn that down and have respect for the
eardrums around you. Or I swear to God I’ll make you listen to 15 hours of
Vivaldi.
Stop freaking out
about the upcoming NATO event in Chicago. It will not rain chaos down upon the
streets. The river will not run red with the blood of international
businessmen. Downtown Chicago will not be overturned by a few thousand
protestors who can’t even agree on what they are protesting. Chicago will be
fine and it should go about as business as usual. Those that want to cause
trouble. You suck and should find a new line of work. Maybe volunteering in
Africa?
The Catholic Church
needs to stop alienating its own people of faith. The Vatican just pointed the
finger at some Nun’s for being “radically feminist”. I think they wanted to
wear shorts to a picnic or something. Get with it Mr. Pope, we want the loving
New Testament God, not the Old Testament wrathful one.
Well, maybe I worry
about a large mix of both small and big things. Maybe everything pisses me off
just a little bit. I suppose that’s why I do take such great joy in the times
when I can step out and back from the world and just breathe.
"tear their fool head off" bwaaa haaaa haaa
ReplyDeleteYou know what pisses me off? When stupid autocorrect turns my "haaaaaa" into "has".
Ok. All of these are valid points.
ReplyDeleteBut be careful. Once you start listing off things that piss you off, your mind can become this express train to misery town that will find you pissed off at even smaller offenses.
That being said - I have your back, so let's go beat up some non-existant protestors until you feel better, m'kay?