Thursday, February 23, 2023

I Can't Play Guitar

 


They kept handing me guitars.

No matter how many times I told them,

“I don’t know how to play guitar.”

It didn’t matter.

They just handed it to me,

told me to go on stage,

in front of thousands of

people, and said,

“you’ll be fine.”

 

But then, they were right,

I never had to play,

something always happened,

and I got to put the guitar away.

Be it a fire drill,

an unruly fan,

an uninvited guest,

an Earthquake;

I just never had to really play.

 

Which was fine,

because I wasn’t sure how

I got there in the first place,

being told to play guitar on stage,

like a baseball fan called out

of the stands to play third base

because the manager could hear,

how good their commentary was

from the bleachers.

 

I know a few minor bass lines

on a guitar in reality,

but I can’t keep a rhythm,

or the beat. I can’t make repetitive

motions for two minutes without

needing to change.

So playing the guitar, has always been

a big, fat, loud, amp ripping, “NO.”

 

“Here’s your chance kid, get out there any play!”

Another guitar,

handed to me.

 

“Damn it.”

 


Monday, February 13, 2023

They Won't Cancel St. Valentine's Day

 


                Cupid looked at his wristwatch anxiously. The bus was already 25 minutes late. He looked down the long straight street for some sign of the bus, but there was just nothing in sight. He pulled at the edges of his diaper and nervously adjusted his “St. Valentine’s Day” sash across his baby sized torso. “This was just irresponsible,” thought Cupid as he tapped his baby foot on the sidewalk.

                  “Why not just fly,” asked a voice from behind Cupid. A disheveled looking man stepped up toward Cupid, “um, you know, because you have, wings, right?” Cupid rolled his eyes.

                 “Hello Dionysus,” sighed Cupid, “You know why I can’t use my wings. They are too small to support my weight here. They only work on Earth and Gamma Hydra Forty-Seven in the Claxar Galaxy,” said Cupid.

                 “Right, right, and you can’t drive because your little baby legs don’t reach the pedals,” said Dionysus as he chuckled. He stumbled forward a little as he tried to regain his bearings. He reached out to the bus stop bench to steady himself. “I almost spilled my wine.”

                 “Yeah. Great,” said Cupid. He looked nervously at his watch again. If he didn’t get on the next bus in the next few minutes, he’d miss his ride to Earth for St. Valentine’s Day. And then no one could meet, and fall in love and make sweet sweet loving.

                 Dionysus sat down on the bench and laughed. He took another swig from is wine skin and wiped his lips with his robes.

                 “Why are you waiting for the bus,” asked Cupid.

                 “Oh, me,” said Dionysus, “I can’t drive be, because, of the thing, the thing with the driving, with my… my license was suspenders, suspended, I mean.”

                 Cupid nodded and took a baby step to his right to move away from Dionysus.  He looked back down the street and there was still no bus in sight.

                 “I don’t think it’s coming,” said Dionysus, “I think that they that hit something. I think they hit, they hit, Sisyphus, or his boulder or both, Ha!”

                 “Is that true? Is that what you heard,” asked Cupid. Cupid felt panic rush though his little baby heart.

                 “I don’t, um, don’t know if that’s what it is, that it is that it’s what it is,” said Dionysus.

                 “What,” asked Cupid, “forget it. I don’t have time.” He took out a tiny cell phone and started frantically trying to find a ChUber.  (Which is of course a Chariot you can call for rides.)

                 “I don’t think you’ll get a ChUber, now, like, it’s almost Valentines Day. They’ll be so busy,” said Dionysus, “but I hope we can hang out like the old, olden, the old days, when you, you get back, because that would be fun.” He fell asleep with his chin on his chest.

                 “Damn it,” said Cupid. “Of all the days…,” He sighed and looked down the street again. A ChUber was two minutes away.


Tuesday, February 7, 2023

Why I Love Writing Poetry

 


Why I love writing poetry...

…is a curious question.

I bet… it’s because of…

Ellipses.

 

Yeah.

Probably because of Ellipses.

 

Or it could very well be the

freedom of words and thoughts

that poetry allows to splash onto

a page in colors too vibrant for

words and words too vibrant for

colors.

 

Or…

 

Ellipses…

 

There’s something so marvelous

and uncanny about how these words

flow from the corners of my mind,

through my arms, into my hands,

into my fingertips and then explode

onto a keyboard, hammered hard with

the disconnected ramblings of

a Tuesday afternoon.

 

…or Ellipses.

 

I can write about love, or loss,

sex or shyness, booze and bread,

bitter tears or uncontrollable fits

of belly laughter, all smeared across this

page, like a baby eating ice cream cake

for the first time.  Fearless and flavorful.

 

Or…ellipses.

 

But really… it’s obviously both.

The words and the spaces between

the words, the things not written,

the things not said, in the silences

in between…  

 

 


Wednesday, February 1, 2023

These Vile Visions

 


Their knives were sharp

and ready as they sat in a

circle around the dining table,

mouths drooling,

waiting for the main course.

 

The knives glittered in the

flickering candlelight around

the cavernous dining room,

flashing steely in bright flares

as their agitated users elbowed each other.

 

A final course of innocence,

soaked in a brine of dreams,

glazed in a red sauce of potential,

all to be devoured in hasty and

messy mastication.

 

A Hieronymus Bosch hellscape painting,

of a horror show dinner, rife

with the belching and blood-curdling

sighs of monstrous ecstasy with each

flickering forkful into putrid mouths.

 

The viewer, watching from above,

horrified at the crass and gaudy

display of gluttony and inconsideration,

was muffling the gags and

vomitus ready to spew from deep in his gut.

 

“Incredible,” said the viewer,

still in shock at the inhuman

display of ravenous consumption,

the depravity and assault on decency

was nearly too much for the viewer to bear.

 

“Please, let me look no more,” said the Viewer,

“this vile scene is too much!”

He covered his eyes with his hands, as if

to clear the sights from his eyes.

“I can’t believe I have to come back here

tomorrow for work,” he said.

 

“What’s wrong with you,” asked the cafeteria worker.

 

“Nothing. Nothing at all,” said the viewer.