I can see myself standing on the far side of this wordless valley, waving my arms, yelling something but the wind it too strong so I can’t hear what I’m yelling to myself. I’m sure it’s something silly like, “Windy enough for you”. I know me pretty well and I’m sure I would make that kind of joke to myself.
More important than the obviously hilarious things I would say to myself is the fact that we’re in this wordless valley. On the bluffs there are lots of free range words, munching and chewing on the grass, but they won’t come down to the valley and get organized into a coherent herd. So I and me are left kicking stones at each other while we try to figure out a way to get those damn words to come down here and start making some sense.
I suggest that we just start pulling them down into the valley. I of course agree with myself and so we start pulling any words we can find into the potato Crabtree muscle legs.
Clearly that plan failed as just pulling random words just makes for a whole lot of nonsense. I suggest that we use some bait and try to lure the good words down in the hopes the less, more useful articles will follow. I ask what we could use for bait. I shrug at myself. Neither of us seems to know what words like.
“I’ve got some peanut butter and jelly”, I say.
“Oooh, you know that phrase is all we can write when we have writers block”, I say.
“Yeah, repeating Peanut butter and Jelly, peanut butter and jelly is just lazy”, I say.
The words moo on the bluff as if to mock us.
“I know”, I say, “Let’s start a fire behind the words and then they’ll have to rush down here into the valley, then we can pick off the words we want, sort of like the caveman did versus the wooly mammoths”.
“Yeaah, I’m not sure about that. I mean the liability of starting a fire. I mean what if the fire went wild and innocent things were damaged or hurt”, I ask.
“I see what you mean”, I say, “So, what should we do?”
I look up at the words on the bluffs and the hills over this valley and sigh.
“I think we’re just going to have to wait until they decide to come down here”, I say.
I look at me and then up at the herds and then back at me.
“You suck. Let’s burn ‘em”, I say.
“You’re so weird”, I reply.