Lately I’ve been on a real Pin-Up girl kick and I owe it all to a very lovely friend of mine. She gave me a birthday card with an illustrated, a well illustrated, pin-up girl and I put it on my refrigerator. Every time I walk into my kitchen I can’t help but see this dark hair beauty, sitting on a big heart pillow, clad in red 1940’s lingerie, teasing me with her eyes. (Her eyes, right. Her eyes) I’m tempted to take it down because something about a 1940’s pin-up girl turning me on seems so strange, considering what’s available on the internet.
It did however bring me to the realization that all that stuff on the internet, all the instant access to pornography and various other things they call pornography isn’t all that interesting compared with the sultry sophistication of this pin-up girl on my fridge. I wonder what she’s thinking and I wonder if she thinks I’m cute. I’d like to make up a back story for her, something like how she sent that card to me after she got off work at the diner to cheer me up while I’m slogging it out in the Battle of the Bulge. I think her name would be Madge or Lilly.
She knows what I like.
For my second article topic today I need to point something out to the slow walkers of the world; get the hell out of the way. Just because you like to mosey your way into work on snowy mornings doesn’t mean everyone behind you likes to. After I got off the train this morning I was literally trapped behind one of these slow walkers. He was just bumbling along the side walk, taking his own sweet time, and every instance I tried to get around him he would seemingly and magically step back in front of me. I actually blurted out, “unbelievable”, as I tried unsuccessfully to navigate around this roadblock of a man.
He finally stepped out of the way and I was able to rush past, along with all the other fast walkers trapped behind him. We moved ahead cursing the slow walker, only to be blocked again by more hordes of slow walkers. I think that TV show, “The Walking Dead”, should totally change its plot and instead of succumbing to a Zombie apocalypse they should just be trying to get to work and are trapped behind the slow walkers. (Show would probably move at about the same pace)
I just can’t figure these slow walkers out; don’t they have someplace to be? If they do, why are they taking such a long time to get there? Are they worried about getting there early? I’d rather stand in a warm lobby for ten minutes than walk slowly around in the cold. It just baffles me.
I think there should be express lanes on the sidewalks for those of us that walk with purpose and speed. I can’t express how very annoying the slow walkers are.
It’s
like
thiiiiiiiiiiiisssssssssss………… sssssss.
Maybe they need a pin-up girl to get home to and impress with groceries to speed them up.
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