Sally covered her face as the bus pulled away from the stop near Jerry’s Honk and Drive. She saw Justin running along the side, calling after her. She stifled the deep sobs she could feel in her chest. The old woman would tell him. She promised.
Rehab had gone about as well as could be expected. She went crazy and screamed and yelled and cried and threw up. She threw up a lot. She probably lost 20 pounds in vomit. Her throat was still sore from it. Her voice had a raspy quality now. The rehab counselor thought she sounded like Lauren Bacall. It was a nice complement but she could tell he wanted to get in her pants. He was such a nerd too.
All the guys at rehab tried to smooth talk her. Even while she was in the throes of withdrawal guys were still hitting on her. She hated it. Being pretty was fine but it was somehow a terrible burden. It wasn’t the attention she wanted. She did discover that it was probably why she started using in the first place. She wanted to be ugly.
It was something the old woman had said to her when she sat down next to her. That old lady, Beatrice was her name, said Sally was probably the prettiest girl she’d ever seen riding the Greyhound. She told her she was surprised because pretty people flew on airplanes while ugly people rode the Greyhound. That old lady, Beatrice, was crazy, but she was kind. She had chuckled at her own joke in a cute, old lady way. Like she had seen it all and knew what it all meant and was in on the joke of it all.
Sally had been feeling sick on the bus since leaving rehab. It wasn’t from withdrawal. It was a sickness in her heart and every beat seemed to make it worse. She couldn’t bear to face Justin. She loved him too much but she knew that every time he looked at her with his big brown eyes she’d remember how awful she was to him. She’d remember the fire. She’d remember how he dragged her from the house into the yard and cried and screamed at her to wake up.
Sally told Beatrice everything. It just poured out of her. She told Beatrice more than she ever spilled to the counselors or in group. It was a flood of things. It was the first time she had been completely honest with anyone. There was something comforting in the eyes of a stranger. Beatrice had held her hand and listened quietly and patiently. Sally told her she just didn’t think she could get off the bus in Anderton. Beatrice told her not to worry. She would take care of it.
Sally looked out the window at the empty farm fields flying by as 60 miles an hour. She’d seen those same wretched fields her entire life. She lost her virginity in one of those damn fields with that jerk Kenny Richards. That was really the first time she understood the curse of beauty. She looked away from the fields and picked up one of the magazines she had brought with her. The model on the cover of the magazine made her feel sicker and she dropped it in the empty seat next to her.
Her mind went back to Justin. He always told her not to pay attention to those magazines because they were designed to make people feel bad about themselves. She thought he was being silly at the time. She needed those beauty tips in those magazines if she was going to get an A in Mr. Foster’s chemistry class. All those short skirts and tight tops were her weapons. That Mr. Foster was a sucker for any female attention. He actually sent Sally a card on Valentine’s Day. He didn’t sign it but she knew it was from him. What a dirty old perv.
Justin wanted to report him to the dean but Sally told him not to. She had already started using by then and she didn’t really care if dirty old Mr. Foster wanted to stare at her breasts all day. As long as she got an A she didn’t care.
Sally brushed her hair off her face and looked out the window again. She wished Justin had gotten on the bus and was sitting next to her now. They could start a new life together wherever this bus stopped. They could get jobs and a home, get married and have kids and no one would have to know anything about them. She imagined Justin and her, sitting on a couch together cuddling under a blanket because they didn’t have enough money to pay for heat but not caring because they had each other.
Sally heard the honking just then. It was loud and blaring and constant. She tried to look back behind her but couldn’t really see what was going on. She looked up at the bus driver and she could see he was watching something in his rearview mirror. The honking got louder and she heard the roar of a V8 eight pull alongside the bus. The bus driver hit the brakes and the bus came to a long hard stop. She heard the squeal of another vehicle’s brakes.
“What the shit is going on”, cursed the bus driver and he opened the bus door and stepped out. He barely got to the road when Justin pushed up past him onto the bus. He was panting and sweating and was wild eyed. Sally stood up and everything she was so worried about melted away.
Justin put out his hand to her.
“C’mon baby. We’re getting off this bus”, he said and smiled at her.
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