Thursday, February 2, 2012

Beware the Groundhog

How much ground could a groundhog grind if a groundhog could grind ground?  That’s today’s tongue twister. Also it appears we’re in for an early spring thanks to our blind devotion to a member of the squirrel family. I’d say it’s been an early spring already here in the wonderful city of Chicago. We’ve been lucky to be experiencing one of the mildest winters I can remember, especially after last year’s Snowmageddon. It’s been pretty nice overall.

It’s Europe I’m a little worried about. They seem to be going through another Ice Age over there. I read an article this morning indicating it was minus -29 degrees in Costanta, Romania. And in Belgium, a much loved fountain of a urinating naked boy (Europeans, what’s up with that?) must be shut off due to the freezing cold because officials are worried the sub-zero temperatures will gum up the fountain’s inner workings.

Meanwhile, I didn’t even wear a sweater under my coat to work today.  So all hail the American Groundhog and his weather prognosticating! Take that Farmer’s Almanac and your prediction that we’ll have some of the worst snowfalls this year. Although I should be a little cautious, it is just February after all and we might see something significant before May arrives. It’s happened before. I remember snowstorms on Easter so maybe my praise of the groundhog is premature.

Speaking of mysterious animals, NOVA was on last night and because I’m a giant super nerd I had to watch. It was all about the dissection of a Great White Shark. Scientists had a Great White sprawled out on a big dissection table, outside, and were cutting the shark open and describing each part and function. It was pretty amazing and incredibly gross. I didn’t know sharks had such a gigantic liver or that their stomachs operate like a meat grinder.  I also didn’t know how they got it on. Well, I mean, I knew they had sex obviously, but I didn’t know they filmed it. Let’s just say it was aggressive and I don’t think he’ll be calling her the next day.  And yes, I will mention here that I would like a girlfriend. Just because it’s funny. (Cough)

So there’s a lot of stuff going in nature, groundhogs predict the weather, it’s freaking cold as hell in Europe and sharks do it in the butt. My, what an amazing world we live on. I guess we sort of rent it though don’t we? I mean, we’re only here for a short time and then get eaten by giant mutated Groundhog/shark hybrids. I suppose we should try to make the most of it then.  

As I re-read what I’ve written above I’m concerned that I haven’t been focused. I’ve been working pretty hard between nearly every paragraph and I think it all might be a little disjointed. Well, I’d like to see you write a daily blog while wrangling, “Logar”, the groundhog/shark, into his electrified cage. 

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